200th post

Dilemma

Character is revealed in what we feel and do without thinking. Trying to act in a certain way to impress people. Isn’t that what we do sometimes? I know I did. But after all that is done, it looks kinda funny when you look back at it. Sometimes it is so obvious; sometimes it is so subtle. No way the person is going to be impressed by what you have done. It is so hard and I understand that feeling. The feeling where you try to belong, trying to feel accepted, trying this and that but not trying to be yourself. In the end, it failed beyond your expectation. It got worst. Now rather than being their friend, you have become someone that they would want to avoid. Feeling of isolation has just begun. Where have the people that once understood you have gone? Have they deserted you too? Aren’t they the ones you can cling on to? You’re all alone in this big big world. Can’t you see me?

God works in mysterious ways in our lives. Our feeling come and go because people want feelings to be satisfied. Feeling and being is totally different. Lack of faith = insecure. We should not deny our feelings. God does not want us to feel bad or down. Then what shall we do? Put on a new self and go. God will send a ray of sunshine over us. It’s a mind set that is controlled. To get people to go into the particular mind set is a challenge. Some of us are alive and free but we can’t fly. We can not reach beyond; we are totally caught in our unbelief. The effectiveness to live up to your life’s motto is affected. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. – Romans 12:2a

It sounds weird when someone reads the content of my blog aloud. It is better to be read than spoken. Hot spring is good for health; cool spring is refreshing. Speaking, Guiding and Keeping are important. No vision if you did not receive the vision first. Now I’m all alone in the midst of people almost twice my age. One did not come and one already left. The empty places beside me mean it’s time for me to concentrate. We are on our way to maturity. Solitude and silence are indispensable. Silence makes Solitude real. Practice silence can help gather your thoughts and evaluate your actions and speech.

Headache…headache…headache… Feeling lightheaded now.

I’m still in the midst of people twice my age. Still could not see properly but this time can understand better than before